A Fable From Developing Attitudes Toward Listening to One Another

Adapted from Robert F. Mager

Once upon a time in a little drop of water, King Amoeba decided he wanted to teach his subjects how to have a better life. So he traveled far and wide throughout the Kingdom of Dropland to tell his people how to be better than they were. But nobody listened.

Psst,” said his advisor. “First you have to get their attention. Here. Rub on this magic potion and you will get everyone’s attention.

So the king did as he was told and went out to teach his people how to be better than they were. But nobody listened. They swam away . . . and held their noses.

Psst,” said his advisor. “You have to be sure they can hear you. Here. Shout into this megaphone and then everyone will listen.”

So the king did as he was told, and went out to spread his wisdom. But nobody listened. They swam away . . . and held their noses . . . and covered their ears.

Psst,” said his advisor. “The people are too stupid to realize what wisdom you have to offer. You have to make them listen for their own good.”

So the king made everyone gather in the Great Solarium while he told them how to be better than they were. But when the Great Doors were opened, everybody swam away so hard and fast that before they knew it they had swum right out of Dropland. And henceforth and forevermore they were referred to as Outdroppers.

AND THE MORAL OF THIS FABLE IS . . . . . NOT TO TALK AT ONE ANOTHER.

A Poem for the World by Jodi Sylvest

My name is Jodi Sylvest and I am in remission from Ewing Sarcoma Bone Cancer and I still have problems with my leg. Because of that I fall a lot, and the other night I fell outside and my cousin picked me up and carried me in. The rest of my cousins came in with him. They stayed for a few minutes and then said good-bye. It made me feel wonderful that they did that for me, so I wrote a poem about them and here it is.

My Angels

Most people think angels have wings,
and gowns, halos and things.
But my angels don’t have either one.
Some of them even bathe in the sun.

My angels where jackets shirts and jeans,
and fix their in really nice things.
My angels use the phone and drive cars,
and the best thing is, they’re not very far.

My angels laugh and my angels play,
I see my angels almost every day.
They hold me close when I’m feeling hurt
, when I fall they pick me up out of the dirt.

My angels have names like David and Brian,
Holly and Brittany, I’m not lien.’ Josh and Joe,
Believe Me it’s so.

My angels are my everything and even more,
and the best thing is, they’re right next door.

A wonderful note from Cathy A Haeffner

Dear Dr. Cates,

During my prayer time this A.M. I was thanking God for the different blessings in my life and you came to mind. I felt the urging to write you and tell you how much of a blessing you have been to me and my family. I don’t know if you were in need of extra encouragement today or I just needed to express my gratefulness to you. Only God knows that, but you have been an answer to my prayers when it comes to my insecurities about teaching Sean. I only have a high school education and not a very good one at that. My teaching Sean is totally done with God’s power and a deep love for my son. You may feel that you haven’t helped much because Sean probably doesn’t stand out in your mind and needing much help compared to most of the children you see. But to me, the test results were like a report card from God that I am in His will and doing OK with His help through you.

I pray that He will continue to give you good health and the strength to continue your grueling schedule for several more years. I am sure you have helped many families and brought peace to many moms. I also pray the Lord will bless you with a long and restful retirement when the time comes. Thanks again for your help with our home school journey.

God bless,
Cathy Haeffner

An encouraging letter from Cathy Cox

Dear Dr. Cates,

I wish to thank you again for taking the time to speak to our humble group of home schooling parents this evening. For me personally, you were a blessing and an answer to prayer. I have felt a leading from the Lord for some time now that our home school needed to be “under” a reputable person or organization. After looking into what is available in our area, I had tentatively selected a Charlotte Mason-styled home school assistance program as the best fit for our family.

That was until I heard you speak tonight. Your presentation specifically answered questions that I had directed to God. You spoke the very heart and mind of why we have chosen to home school our children. Your presentation of FCM’s program and philosophies were a tongue and groove answer to our concerns about the direction that our home school program was headed and where we wanted it to go. This is why, though I will admit to being a bit shell shocked at how the Lord had answered my prayers, I did not hesitate to write you the deposit for my three children to be evaluated by you or your staff. To be honest, I had no intention of attending your presentation tonight. But the Lord knew our needs and knew your program would fill them, satisfying our desires to provide our children a quality education that will give them the ability to go in any direction the Lord leads them in their adult lives.

Thank you, Dr. Cates and FCM, for your ministry to home schooling families. You are greatly appreciated and we eagerly look forward to seeing you in July.

Sincerely,

Cathy Cox

Letter from the University of Missouri

UNIVERSITY OF MISSOURI-ROLLA

Educating Tomorrow’s Leaders

Office of Admission and Student Financial Assistance
106 Parker Hall
1870 Miner Circle
Rolla, MO 65409-1060
Telephone: 573-3414165
Toll Free: 1-800-522-0938
FAX: 573-341-4082
E-mail: umROLLA@umr.edu
www. urn r.edu/admissions

April 10,2000

Dr. P. Gates
Faith Christian Academy
864 Poplar Creek Rd.
Oliver Springs, TN 37840

Dear Dr. P. Gates:

Thanks for continuing to send us your bright and talented students. As the college recruitment process slowly comes to an end, we are delighted for your support and look forward to serving the technological needs of your future graduates.

Along with this letter, please find scholarship certificates for presentation at your annual awards ceremony. Certificates are enclosed for each student and each specific scholarship the student(s) has (have) been awarded. There may be additional certificates arriving shortly as we process the more recently accepted student scholarships. We are very proud of your and soon-to-be our students! On behalf of the entire Admission and Student Financial Assistance staff at UMR, thank you for your part in Educating Tomorrow’s Leaders….

Robert W. Whites
Associate Director

P.S There are a few select scholarships still available for strong academic students, please contact me directly should you have any late applicants!

Excerpt of a wonderful letter from Anne Pearcy

Hi Dr. Cates!

Thank you for completing Colin’s grades so quickly. Yes, you certainly may quote our comments on his ACT scores. But may I add a couple of things? Not only was Colin not generally a good tester, but he was definitely weak in English. The curriculum you recommended for him this year (which was very heavy in language arts…) has very definitely strengthened, sharpened and bolstered his aptitude in English (from vocabulary and grammar to comprehension. That stood out to us immediately in his ACT scores (his showing was as strong in English as it was in Math and Science – that’s a first!!!).

Also, I just wanted to compliment you on your report card format. In order for Colin to receive credit at our local high school, for this year of home school, we had to submit his report card to the head of the guidance and career office and the principal. Once they saw it, they said there would be no problem transferring his credits. That is testimony to the professional look of your format. Colin’s counselor, who has been following him since we took him out last spring, has been quite impressed with his whole curriculum for this year. Anyway, all this to say that I believe Faith Christian Academy has just won a few more votes, from secular academia, for the viability of home-schooling! Good work!!

Thank you to you and your staff for being faithful in what God has given you to do.

Blessings and appreciation from our family,

Anne Pearcy

Two Students of Faith Christian Academy Receive Governor’s Award!

Faith Christian Academy and Dr. Paul Cates is proud to announce that two of our Students, Joseph “David” Starbuck and Sarah Haley will be receiving awards from the Governor of Tennessee. This award is the Outstanding Homeschool Student Award.

There are only fourteen Students in the entire State to receive this reward and only two from this region.

David and Sarah received their awards on March 28, 2000

Read This! An essay from one of Dr. Cates’s graduates introduced by a letter from his mother!

March 20,2000

Dear Dr. Cates:

I have enclosed James’ graduation announcement (We are unable to attend the graduation in Pigeon Forge). James borrowed a cap & gown from Kathy Hayes.

For one of the many scholarships that James applied for, he had to write n essay on an educator or a person who has influenced his life the most. I sat down with James for the first time and explained to him what life was like for us and him, before and after his first testing with you when he was four years old.

This [following] letter is a copy of what James wrote:

James’s Essay

There are many people that have greatly influenced my education and my goals: teachers, tutors, friends and especially my parents. Therefore to choose from among them would be an almost impossible task. Fortunately, there is a person that was behind my entire educational development and trained many of the people who taught me.

I suffered from a severe speech impediment as a child, to make myself understood I had to play a complex game of charades. This was very frustrating for me, because not only did I not comprehend why people could not understand me (which frustrated me even more), but was also laughed at (which made me angry). Many people thought I was either retarded or extremely stupid, others said I would just “grow out of it.”

When I turned five years old, there was no improvement in my speech. If enrolled in public school I would have been considered a special education student. But my parents did not feel that the public school system had the resources to properly instruct me. My parents decided that I needed a one-on-one education, so they decided to home-school me. They were told about Dr. Paul Cates, he helps children ranging from the mentally retarded to the mentally gifted, with excellent results. My parents took me in for diagnostic testing, which Dr. Cates used to both diagnose my impediments and to develop a curriculum that was suited to my special needs. After the testing he told my parents that I had dyslexia, acute articulation disorder, and severe hyperactivity, but he advised them not to label me thus. Instead I should be encouraged to do my best and never be compared to others, nor should my problems be used as an excuse for poor performance. He showed them how to teach me and reap the most benefits. His enthusiasm and wisdom greatly encouraged my parents and I. Without his continued support and knowledge I would not have been able to succeed in academics or even been able to accomplish many of the goals I have set for myself. I owe my entire education to his work and would have never been able to go to college without his help.

Thank you for your time.

A letter from a mother: OUR STORY

July 30,2001

Teaching our children is an incredible and sometimes overwhelming call. With my first child I did not always recognize a problem, but in looking back, can I say that the first sign of difficulty was in nursing.

At age two, the pediatrician wanted his speech evaluated for precautionary measures. The earliest label was a speech delay with an unofficial observation of apraxia. The illustration that I was given was that as an adult, we are able to drive a car, which requires many steps that we do without thinking each one through. These include looking in the mirrors, putting your foot on the gas or break, and changing gears if driving a standard transmission. And all of this is done without much thought. But for my child, each step would take his full attention and great effort and so it was as he learned to speak. He had to learn how to open his mouth and make use of the muscles in his face and jaw. This took much effort and concentration on his part.

As he progressed in his speech, it became clear that speech was not the only area that he would have to work harder than others to succeed. With each evaluation came more “labels”, speech delayed, sequential processing, auditory processing.

The first year we saw the most improvement. The speech pathologist came to the house for one hour a week of one-on-one coaching and instruction. The second year, at age 3, he no longer qualified for the Infants and Toddler program and I was advised to put him in a setting of socialization with other children who also were speech delayed. This was the year that convinced me to homeschool my children. The speech pathologist spent about 20 minutes a week with each group of 4 children, or about 5 minutes a week of helping my child learn to speak. The rest of the time, he was expected to learn to speak and behave from other children who could not speak clearly and who often acted out in anger and frustration.

At 4 years, I found a coop preschool for the socialization they insisted he needed and enabled me to take part in his learning. I transported him once a week for speech to what would be his school. The speech pathologist wanted no parts of me observing her teaching and she weekly made it clear in front of my child. I insisted that her one-half hour a week needed reinforced daily in order to be more effective. It was not until February that the principal of the school finally interceded and I no longer had a weekly battle. By May, I was told she would be leaving the state the following school year.

At 5 years, we began homeschooling kindergarten and waited for the next speech pathologist to contact us. Our first contact was late October and she requested that our child be evaluated. We agreed. The results were reviewed just before Christmas break and his first speech session for the year was in February. By the year’s end, we received a call from the Assistant Principal who said, “I see your child is still receiving services, how is he doing?” To which I responded, “I don’t know, you tell me” and proceeded to tell her how often he had been seen this year. She said, we would arrange for another evaluation in the fall.

So at 6 years old, in addition to the labels, my husband was told by the speech pathologist, that has seen my child 4 times, “they do have medication for children like yours”. That was our last evaluation and dealings with the public school system.

There was no question now that our only option was to homeschool. And so we continued with 1st grade. But I too, saw the inability to focus, struggling in learning, frustration and even anger on both of our parts in the learning setting. Yet, I knew the only way he would be accepted into a school setting was with medication and I did not believe in my heart that was the answer.

So I struggled. I began to withdraw. My inadequacies and lack of education became overwhelming and I fell into a severe depression. So many homeschoolers would share success stories, what was I doing wrong?

In the Bible, it tells us that God knows our hearts and needs even before we do. I knew I needed help with my child but also no longer trusted “the professionals” and did not know where to turn.

In June of 1999, I was told that Dr. Cates would be speaking at the CHEN conference. He tests children academically and came highly recommended by a cousin of my husband. I was skeptical, uncomfortable and did not have anyone to go with. But before I was going to let a stranger test my child again, I wanted to hear what he had to say. So I went to the conference, specifically to hear Dr. Cates speak.

What he said made me cry. He spoke of my child and yet had never met him. He understood the frustration that both of us were experiencing. I scheduled testing which did confirm the auditory processing problems. But more severe was a visual-processing problem, which no one had been able to recognize. Dr. Cates prescribed curriculum for us, which meant we were no longer guessing at what would work and what would not work.

He recommended a vision specialist, Dr. Kotlicky in Columbia, who was able to determine my child’s lack of binocular vision. Thus explaining his inability to stay focused visually and confirming that medication in the case of my child, was not going to correct this problem. If anything, the side effects of the medication would have intensified it. We instead began a visual therapy program.

Dr. Cates also invited us to his seminar in Pigeon Forge, TN where we met others, many others struggling with teaching their children. We learned not just how to use the curriculum that he prescribes, but why we are using it, why it is effective and essential for success, especially with our special children.

God knew my heart and my needs before I did. Learning is hard work at our home and we still have frustrating days. But, we rely more and more on God, who has made homeschooling possible for us and led us to Dr. Cates who is teaching us to teach our children in ways that they can be successful and learn.

Two years ago, God also called me to be Sunday school superintendent at our church. This is now the only traditional classroom setting that I am exposed to. It concerns me greatly how many children are labeled and medicated, and how many parents are searching for ways to help their children.

When you struggle and find a solution, you want to jump up and tell the world. I have learned a great deal about my children and myself and with the help of counseling I am climbing out of depression.

I am inviting Dr. Cates to speak at our church with the hope that others, who become frustrated in teaching their children or other people’s children, will find solutions to their frustrations. My hope is to educate people in understanding why children sometimes act as they do, why it can be so hard and help them explore all possibilities and options before medicating their child. Help them to teach the children as God calls us to do.

Dr. Cates will be speaking on processing disorders, Wed., Oct. 17, 7p.m. to 9p.m. , and leading a workshop to demonstrate teaching techniques on Thurs. Oct. 18 from 9a.m. to 3p.m. at Community United Methodist Church in Pasadena Md. For additional information or reservation call Jeanne Maddox at 410-360-2570 or email at saysf@bellatlantic.com (seek and you shall find).

What are Learning Disabilities?

“Learning Disabilities” are those preventing children of normal or above normal intelligence from progressing at the customary pace of regular school classes, or from responding to usual teaching techniques employed.  Homeschooling children with learning disabilities can change their future, and at Faith Christian Ministries we can provide you with the tools for success.  

The child with learning disabilities may have one or more of the following characteristics:

  • Hyperactivity
  • Hypoactivity
  • Short attention span
  • Distractability
  • Impulsiveness
  • Poor visual-motor coordination
  • Poor sense of balance
  • Poor large muscle coordination
  • Poor fine motor coordination
  • Rapid and excessive changes of mood
  • Difficulty with reasoning
  • Difficulty with abstract thinking
  • Faulty perception
  • Excessive repetition of a thought or action
  • Problems in social interaction with peer group
  • Inconsistent, unpredictable behavior
  • Resistance to discipline
  • Poor auditory or visual retention

Each of these children is unique. Being afflicted with just some of the above characteristics can make conforming to the demands of home and school most difficult.

When provided with understanding, instruction, and attention, many of these children are able to fit naturally into regular classes and develop their potentials as happy, productive citizens.

The ultimate goal is to provide the resources when homeschooling your children with learning disabilities an opportunity for total self-realization, to enable him to achieve dignity through his abilities and accomplishments.  For more information call 828-435-0670 or click the orange button on your screen to start a live chat.